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COMING SOON! THE SECOND KINOKARNO FILM FESTIVAL! WATCH THIS SPACE!
I am pleased to announce that the First KinoKarno Film Festival took place on FRIDAY NOVEMBER 4th at The GREENWICH PICTURE
HOUSE CINEMA. See below for full festival report!!!!
Welcome to the website for the First Kinokarno Film Festival!
This is an exciting new film festival that will showcase weird and wonderful films that perhaps wouldn't normally get
shown at the more 'serious' festivals that proliferate the world. If you've gone and 'Made Your Own Damn Movie'(to quote the
the great Lloyd Kaufman of TROMA) then this is for you.
CLICK HERE FOR THE MONOGRAM WEBSITE!
The First KinoKarno Film Festival.
Festival report.
On the evening of Friday the Fourth of November the Screening Room of the delightful Greenwich Picture House Cinema became
KinoKarno Land for the night. About fifty turned up and settled into the rather too comfy plush reclining chairs to watch
the quirky and amusing films selected by Festival Organiser, Mr Fred Karno.
It was great to see that alot of the filmmakers had turned up to see this unique collection of short films.Introduced
by Jan Manthey, the show began with a film about working in a cinema.
POPCORN (Dave Shortland, 6mins) A neat little comedy about two bored multiplex cinema attendants who make up wild stories
about the additives in the gruesome popcorn that they serve up. Manages to pack in zombies, secret government agents and more
in it's short running time. Neatly sums up the boredom that comes with these menial jobs.
FREE INSIDE ( Pete Hawkins, 5 mins) A quite brilliantly sick film, the of which is quite simply a man eating his breakfast.
Has some quite spectacular special effects and was a great crowd pleaser.
FINDING NUNN (Sanjay Joshi, 2 mins) This sick comedy short about an old lady and her dog got a big laugh. Not for animal
lovers.
LOVE HURTS ACTUALLY (Ollie Carmody, 5 mins) Another film about a bored shop worker (is there a theme here?), a girl writes
on a notpad whetehr the customer loves her or not. The first half has a hilarious scene with a grubby pervert buying a porn
mag, but the second half is slightly weaker, but the denoument brought a few gasps from the audience.
DISCONNECTED (Jane McGee, 4 mins) A brilliantly shot comedy that serves as a warning to us all about not paying bills
on time.
REVERSING THE POLARITY ( Marq English, 30 mins) I loved this one. A really funny spoof documentary about a cancelled TV
sci fi show called TIMEQUAKE which gathers together the cast and crew to reminisce for the DVD release. The show TIMEQUAKE
is an obvious Dr Who rip off, and features dodgy eighties fashions and special effects. What really makes this film work is
the fact that the old clips of TIMEQUAKE were actually filmed about 15 years ago so the actors do look a hell of a lot younger.
Spoof documentaries are difficult to pull off, but this one is spot on.
THE INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES OF THE SLIGHTLY TALLER BOY ( Alex Emslie, 3 mins) Long title. Short film. But very funny, and
got a great audience response. I love films about pickled onions.
EATING OUT ( Arun Kumar, 10 mins) A slighty more subtle comedy than the preceding films, but one that got good laughs
from the audience. Great performance from the lead actor.
ME MY SWAMI AND I (Graham Higgins, 10 mins) A very slickly filmed comic tale of (fake?) gurus and picking up women in
supermarkets.
CAN YOU KEEP IT UP WITH THIS THAT AND THE OTHER FOR A WEEK? (Jan Manthey, 15mins) Just about gets the longest title award,
this farcical tribute to the Great British Sex comedies of the 1970's had got big laughs from the audience, and also titillatedthem
with it's enless parade of scantily clad beauties.
There was then a splendid live set from London eccentrics, MONOGRAM, with a show stopping performance by VIC PRATT of
the theme song fron CAN YOU KEEP IT WITH THIS THAT AND THE OTHER FOR A WEEK?
Fetch a warm teaspoon.
There then followed a preview of the forthcoming feature film VAMPIRES OF BLOODY ISLAND presented by Allin Kempthorne.
The film looks like it will be a cross betwen Carry On Screaming and The Rocky Horror Picture Show, which may or may not be
a good thing.
SUICIDE ( Sarah Sumeray ,4 mins) A lot darker in tone, this showed magician Sarah performing the classic razor blade swallowing
trick, with gruesome twists. Had the audience squirming.
FACE ACHE ( Ann Catterall, 12 mins) This well made, slightly disturbing comedy about a young man whose acne solves crimes
(!), was another great crowd pleaser.
WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE ( Charlie Blackfield, 2 mins) An amusing cheap and cheerful comedy about TV licensing.
COME OUTSIDE ( Rob Hurtt, 8 mins) This surreal, disturbing short about birth, death, life and sausages had many people
scratching their heads in puzzlement. I must admit that it took me about 3 viewings to finally get what it was about, but
maybe I have a low IQ. It certainly threw up a number of startling images that stuck in the mind long after it had finished.
And so to the closing film of this cinematic extravaganza, which I must admit was my favourite...
KILLER NUNS AND THE ZOMBIES FROM CHANNEL 6 ( Tom Fallows, 25 mins)
Introduced by the great producer J J Colossus, this tale of zombies, mad scientists and catholic vengenge was another
crowd pleaser. Shown ib black and white it was a well made pastiche of bad American monster flicks (and in one scene a spoof
of APOCALYPSE NOW). Like REVERSING THE POLARITY, this film got the spoofing spot on and was really very funny.
And so after this marathon viewing session, the time came to vote for the favourite film. After much paper fluttring and
last minute canvassing for votes the winner was announce. It was a very close result but the winner of the FIIST KINOKARNO
FILM FESTIVAL AUDIENCE AWARD was...
THE INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES OF THE SLIGHTLY TALLER BOY! Mr Emslie was there in person to collect his award, with a tears
of joy in his eyes at the thought of winning this pretigious award which was a spiffing certificate, some KinoKarno goodies
and a brown paper bag containing four DVD's of some Classic British Seventies Sauce! Well done Alex!
Well done to all the film makers in fact, you are all winners in my eyes. And thanks to everyone who turned up, it's great
to know that there is an audience out there for these films that often get ignored by the 'big' festivals.
Farewell then, and we must do this again some time.
FRED KARNO
Chief Executive Deputy Officer of KinoKarno.
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